Friday, January 16, 2009
January Sixteenth, Two Thousand and Nine.
From a young age I’ve always thought of myself as different. I’ve considered myself to have an advantage over people; without ever knowing what the advantage is exactly. Maybe it is just a form of arrogance, and I’m subconsciously deeming myself superior compared to my peers. I have high expectations of my future when it comes to school, work, and the relationships I share with people; however, I have always had these expectations. Though at times I have strayed from the path, the goals were always in mind.
In elementary I strived to have good grades mostly because my dad and grandfather would pay me, however when asked what I was going to have as a career I would reply “Anything that makes a lot of money!” When my grades began to fall my reply would be the same. No matter what the person thought, or what their comments tried to enrage within me I would keep a level headed calmness, and confidence. Seventh and Eighth grade did not go so well. Since arriving in Seventh grade I had friends that were grades ahead of me; when I asked them for advice about surviving junior high they would reply “Well, nothing really counts until ninth grade.” So my grades dropped and I didn’t care much about it; I figured that it really didn’t count until ninth grade, but I was wrong. Now that I am in ninth grade it is evident that my old habits did not carry on with me into this school year, and I am extremely successful and proficient with my school work and informational intake. I only hope that I continue to do well in school so that I will have a high income job that I enjoy.
A job, well what can I say? The idea of getting (or maintaining) one scares me! Not because I think it will be hard for me to do, but because I fear that I could not be performing my best while having the job. I am a perfectionist (as I’ve explained mannyyy times before) and because of that I always evaluate the things I do and what others do, so that my comparison is accurate that I can be better than them. Early in my life I realized that life is based on competition between schools, companies, governments and etc. As humans we are constantly trying to outdo each other, so in order to do well in life you must be able to adapt quickly and in an orderly fashion. I am interested in Technology and Artistic subjects. I have not definitely decided what sort of job I want to have but what I know is this: 1) It must involved Technology and Art. 2) I want to enjoy it. 3) I want to get paid a lot to do it. You might be thinking, “Well, that’s all fine and dandy but your expectations are too high.” And they might be, however I am sure that there is a perfect job out there for me and I will not settle for anything less than that perfect job. Now, my education and future career are constantly nagging at my brain, but there is also the matter of my social well being.
I have never been very choosy about the friends I have, they must simply pass of the criteria of: being trustworthy, kind, and vibrant; lately however there has been an addition to the criteria and that is they must be positive. I am easily affected by the people’s moods around me and because of this I experience constant mood swings. I have been unable to change that quality in myself and so I took advantage of my life and decided to apply it to others. Although the basic criteria seems simple, the four subjects that are enlisted fall into different categories when applied to different scenarios and my ruling does not change (no matter the situation); I am firm and set with the expectations I have of those I choose to call my friends. I’ve decided that no matter who I choose to be my friends I mustn’t let them keep me down, because although I’d like to drag them with me their values are probably different and chances are we’re heading in two different directions.
It can be said that I have a head on my shoulders and I know just what I’m going to do with my life, this is partially true. All I can say is my future is undetermined, but completely decided.
In elementary I strived to have good grades mostly because my dad and grandfather would pay me, however when asked what I was going to have as a career I would reply “Anything that makes a lot of money!” When my grades began to fall my reply would be the same. No matter what the person thought, or what their comments tried to enrage within me I would keep a level headed calmness, and confidence. Seventh and Eighth grade did not go so well. Since arriving in Seventh grade I had friends that were grades ahead of me; when I asked them for advice about surviving junior high they would reply “Well, nothing really counts until ninth grade.” So my grades dropped and I didn’t care much about it; I figured that it really didn’t count until ninth grade, but I was wrong. Now that I am in ninth grade it is evident that my old habits did not carry on with me into this school year, and I am extremely successful and proficient with my school work and informational intake. I only hope that I continue to do well in school so that I will have a high income job that I enjoy.
A job, well what can I say? The idea of getting (or maintaining) one scares me! Not because I think it will be hard for me to do, but because I fear that I could not be performing my best while having the job. I am a perfectionist (as I’ve explained mannyyy times before) and because of that I always evaluate the things I do and what others do, so that my comparison is accurate that I can be better than them. Early in my life I realized that life is based on competition between schools, companies, governments and etc. As humans we are constantly trying to outdo each other, so in order to do well in life you must be able to adapt quickly and in an orderly fashion. I am interested in Technology and Artistic subjects. I have not definitely decided what sort of job I want to have but what I know is this: 1) It must involved Technology and Art. 2) I want to enjoy it. 3) I want to get paid a lot to do it. You might be thinking, “Well, that’s all fine and dandy but your expectations are too high.” And they might be, however I am sure that there is a perfect job out there for me and I will not settle for anything less than that perfect job. Now, my education and future career are constantly nagging at my brain, but there is also the matter of my social well being.
I have never been very choosy about the friends I have, they must simply pass of the criteria of: being trustworthy, kind, and vibrant; lately however there has been an addition to the criteria and that is they must be positive. I am easily affected by the people’s moods around me and because of this I experience constant mood swings. I have been unable to change that quality in myself and so I took advantage of my life and decided to apply it to others. Although the basic criteria seems simple, the four subjects that are enlisted fall into different categories when applied to different scenarios and my ruling does not change (no matter the situation); I am firm and set with the expectations I have of those I choose to call my friends. I’ve decided that no matter who I choose to be my friends I mustn’t let them keep me down, because although I’d like to drag them with me their values are probably different and chances are we’re heading in two different directions.
It can be said that I have a head on my shoulders and I know just what I’m going to do with my life, this is partially true. All I can say is my future is undetermined, but completely decided.
--Cloud Envy.
3:24 PM
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3:24 PM
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