Monday, June 8, 2009
Monday, June 8, 2009
I haven’t typed up in this blog for months so I figure it’s time to give it a go again. Right now there are a lot of things I’m thinking about but the main thing is Couch Tour. Couch tour is an event that takes place at the Layton Hills mall every 8th of June, this year the Krew skate team is visiting as well as the bands Emery and The Bled will be performing later in the day. Not only is it a main social event but I’m completely stoked because all of my friends will be there. Today is going to be a memorable day for sure. So, summer Oh’nine is going to be completely and undoubtedly epic. I am finally fifteen this summer, and therefore my dad has decided I’m old enough to do what I want.
School got out last Friday, and although it’s only been a few days I’ve already had some very intense adventures. I’m glad that school is out, although I loved my teachers there at Fairfield Junior High, I thought some of their rules and the way they ran things were corrupt. One of the biggest things I hated about it was the Hall Nazi. I mean I should be sympathetic because the lady gets paid and it’s her job to be a *****, but it isn’t right, no. No one should be paid to look down girls’ shirts or comment on the fit of boys pants.
Lately there have been a lot of teachers convicted of having sexual contact with their students, and it’s scary. I wouldn’t think that any of my teachers at Fairfield would have done anything like that… But it just is depressing to hear about it all. It also makes me mad considering that some of the ‘victimized’ students agreed to have sexual intercourse, or gave ‘favors’, it’s giving the rest of us teenagers a bad name.
Teenagers. Sometimes I really hate being a teenager because we’re persecuted for what the bad kids do. People always look down on teenagers because we’re trouble makers, and we’re basically no good. But that isn’t true, I wish I could be an example for people so they’d know that not all teenagers are bad. I’m not a perfect example or anything, I’m not a saint, but I’m not a hellion either. I have my boundaries, I have values, and I’m looking forward to my future. All the teenagers that are the ‘bad eggs’ just haven’t gotten themselves together yet, but eventually they will.
So I suppose this is the end of my blog, I have a lot that I’m thinking about right now so I can’t really give it a proper title, but it really doesn’t matter. I’ll try to type back more frequently, and come up with more creative things to talk about.
School got out last Friday, and although it’s only been a few days I’ve already had some very intense adventures. I’m glad that school is out, although I loved my teachers there at Fairfield Junior High, I thought some of their rules and the way they ran things were corrupt. One of the biggest things I hated about it was the Hall Nazi. I mean I should be sympathetic because the lady gets paid and it’s her job to be a *****, but it isn’t right, no. No one should be paid to look down girls’ shirts or comment on the fit of boys pants.
Lately there have been a lot of teachers convicted of having sexual contact with their students, and it’s scary. I wouldn’t think that any of my teachers at Fairfield would have done anything like that… But it just is depressing to hear about it all. It also makes me mad considering that some of the ‘victimized’ students agreed to have sexual intercourse, or gave ‘favors’, it’s giving the rest of us teenagers a bad name.
Teenagers. Sometimes I really hate being a teenager because we’re persecuted for what the bad kids do. People always look down on teenagers because we’re trouble makers, and we’re basically no good. But that isn’t true, I wish I could be an example for people so they’d know that not all teenagers are bad. I’m not a perfect example or anything, I’m not a saint, but I’m not a hellion either. I have my boundaries, I have values, and I’m looking forward to my future. All the teenagers that are the ‘bad eggs’ just haven’t gotten themselves together yet, but eventually they will.
So I suppose this is the end of my blog, I have a lot that I’m thinking about right now so I can’t really give it a proper title, but it really doesn’t matter. I’ll try to type back more frequently, and come up with more creative things to talk about.
--Cloud Envy.
8:30 AM
0 commented
8:30 AM
0 commented
Sunday, March 1, 2009
March first, two thousand and nine.
My fingers brushed over the keys of my keyboard and a hopeless frown pulled at my lips. My eyes were closed as I typed because of the fatigue that drained my body; I just wanted to lean forward enough to where my head rested on the desk so I could sleep, however I was having to type up an explanation. An explanation. I’ve always had an explanation on hand, but I have never liked to explain myself or my actions, but this time the occasion called for it. My eyelids flickered open and I began to proofread what I had typed. There were a few grammatical errors, but while I was reading a gut wrenching question arose. Who had typed this? I had sat there for quite awhile trying to pull the excuse together, but I don’t think I had actually thought about what I was typing. The characters that were arranged in the email was typed by a stranger; it had to have been typed by a stranger. It didn’t sound like me at all. The email was addressing my English teacher about how I couldn’t continue in the Honors English class.
Lately I have been faced with a lot of things that have caused my energy and persistence to sluggishly come to a halt. The persistent war between my mother and father have always been a large force in my life, and lately the battle has become more gruesome and bloody. Since I am the (present) oldest sibling I have to be the peacemaker between the rivals as well as explain to my siblings what is going on, however I am finding it harder and harder to play peacemaker with the other events that are taking place. In five days my birthday arrives and I will be a year closer to the grave; since I am still very young it is not such a bad thing but it still brings more responsibility. The approaching date is not something to be sore about, but inside it makes me anxious because it means that I’m getting closer and closer to bigger events that will take place. Things like: driver’s license, graduation, moving out, finding a partner, etc. I shouldn’t be stressing over these occurrences because they are unavoidable but thinking about them makes me uneasy. With life comes education. I am taking a couple online courses as well as seven mandatory courses at a Junior High and so I am always busy with homework and my studies, but lately it has been excruciating trying to keep track of everything and stay on task. So I’m basically juggling my family, court, school, and future anticipations. But with all this going on my friends are starting to see a change.
Everyday I have a new comment from a different friend regarding me in general. “Are you alright? You don’t look so good,” one would say. While another would comment, “You better slow down your going to wear yourself out.” And I’m starting to think that they are right. I can do anything if I set my mind to it, but there are things like energy that I cannot control. There are only so many hours in one day and there ARE things that I cannot multitask. I don’t like the fact that I can’t be superwoman, but that doesn’t make me quit trying to be. Because of that I am wearing myself down to the bone. My brain is constantly fried and I find myself crying at different intervals of the day just because of exhaustion; of course not at school. School is a place where you go to learn, to be taught. It is not a place of main socialization and it is improper to show weakness such as crying. If I were to be caught showing any weakness my friends would jump at the opportunity to make me a center of attention, and that is something I definitely do not like and do not need.
I am a person who likes to be in control. I like to know dates, facts, times, and anything that has to do with me in precision and detail. I get a lot of negative feedback about this but I really don’t care what others think. If they want to live their life with everything everywhere and nothing in order that is their decision and I shouldn’t be commenting on the way that they live their life, however I am not going to live mine like theirs. I wish that there were more hours in a day so I could get everything done, but there isn’t and there is no way that I can bend time and space to fit my needs. So now I am not slowing down, or dropping out. I am going to accomplish everything I set out to do even if it means tiring myself out every single day.
The above is the personality I know, the above is the person I am. I am confident and strong, not weak and pathetic. While I was typing that email to my teacher the whole paragraph said ‘FEEBLE AND NO GOOD.’ So when I was done fixing the grammatical errors in my paragraph, and after I had read the whole thing over quite a few times my index finger found the backspace key and I deleted the entire thing. Then after that I opened up word and began to type this blog, because I am not going to quit.
Lately I have been faced with a lot of things that have caused my energy and persistence to sluggishly come to a halt. The persistent war between my mother and father have always been a large force in my life, and lately the battle has become more gruesome and bloody. Since I am the (present) oldest sibling I have to be the peacemaker between the rivals as well as explain to my siblings what is going on, however I am finding it harder and harder to play peacemaker with the other events that are taking place. In five days my birthday arrives and I will be a year closer to the grave; since I am still very young it is not such a bad thing but it still brings more responsibility. The approaching date is not something to be sore about, but inside it makes me anxious because it means that I’m getting closer and closer to bigger events that will take place. Things like: driver’s license, graduation, moving out, finding a partner, etc. I shouldn’t be stressing over these occurrences because they are unavoidable but thinking about them makes me uneasy. With life comes education. I am taking a couple online courses as well as seven mandatory courses at a Junior High and so I am always busy with homework and my studies, but lately it has been excruciating trying to keep track of everything and stay on task. So I’m basically juggling my family, court, school, and future anticipations. But with all this going on my friends are starting to see a change.
Everyday I have a new comment from a different friend regarding me in general. “Are you alright? You don’t look so good,” one would say. While another would comment, “You better slow down your going to wear yourself out.” And I’m starting to think that they are right. I can do anything if I set my mind to it, but there are things like energy that I cannot control. There are only so many hours in one day and there ARE things that I cannot multitask. I don’t like the fact that I can’t be superwoman, but that doesn’t make me quit trying to be. Because of that I am wearing myself down to the bone. My brain is constantly fried and I find myself crying at different intervals of the day just because of exhaustion; of course not at school. School is a place where you go to learn, to be taught. It is not a place of main socialization and it is improper to show weakness such as crying. If I were to be caught showing any weakness my friends would jump at the opportunity to make me a center of attention, and that is something I definitely do not like and do not need.
I am a person who likes to be in control. I like to know dates, facts, times, and anything that has to do with me in precision and detail. I get a lot of negative feedback about this but I really don’t care what others think. If they want to live their life with everything everywhere and nothing in order that is their decision and I shouldn’t be commenting on the way that they live their life, however I am not going to live mine like theirs. I wish that there were more hours in a day so I could get everything done, but there isn’t and there is no way that I can bend time and space to fit my needs. So now I am not slowing down, or dropping out. I am going to accomplish everything I set out to do even if it means tiring myself out every single day.
The above is the personality I know, the above is the person I am. I am confident and strong, not weak and pathetic. While I was typing that email to my teacher the whole paragraph said ‘FEEBLE AND NO GOOD.’ So when I was done fixing the grammatical errors in my paragraph, and after I had read the whole thing over quite a few times my index finger found the backspace key and I deleted the entire thing. Then after that I opened up word and began to type this blog, because I am not going to quit.
--Cloud Envy.
1:00 PM
1 commented
1:00 PM
1 commented
Thursday, February 5, 2009
"Please, Don't Recycle."
No matter the store I walk into this time of the year everything is decorated with pinks, reds, whites and confetti hearts. It is February and Valentine’s day is close upon us, nine days away in fact. Most people love this holiday and are overcome with joy when it shows itself to us once a year, but not me. The DJ’s on the radio go overboard with mooshy love songs and they retell stories of lost or present lovers, and wish out good cheer to all the other love birds out there. Most people accept his wish of good cheer, but not me. And what is this all for? Why do confetti hearts and warm bright colors engulf the month of February? Love. Love is the reason for it; it is the reason for all the foolishness and calamity that takes place during this second month of every new year.
I would like to have someone to love around this time, and it seems that any other month in the year I in fact do have a special someone. But once Valentine’s day creeps closer and the days on my calendar slowly diminish to the single digits, something terrible happens. This blog is going to express my rage and sorrowful emotion because I know I can’t express it any other way without ripping my hair out. I met this boy spontaneously, and instantly we became the best of friends. Of course when something like this happens it seems magical, and although I was very happy that I had met this person I was also wary and afraid of being hurt… But with the displays of his fondness, and his honesty; my wariness began to fade and I didn’t have the slightest worry or anxiety about our situation. And , so, like an idiot I allowed myself to be overcome with emotion and my mind with an overpowering sense of affection and well being. However like every other good thing, there is a consequence or a small chance of the good thing becoming bad.
Its peculiar that every time something absolutely amazing happens to me something equally evil and horrible happens and throws the good feelings out of whack and leaves me with my chest ripped open and my heart beating within it; so fragile and vulnerable to any sort of attack that could be thrown at it and rip its soft tissue to ribbons. Of course maybe I am overreacting, and now that I’m reflecting on what I’ve just typed it does seem a little odd that I’m reacting this way. Because usually relationships happen with me, and if they end I am slightly sorrowful but I maintain a dignified composer. I poured my heart and soul into this little kid, and my expectations for him were high. But now I doubt I can ever see him again (even as a friend) without bursting into humiliating tears; And its like a cycle, once my story reaches its climax it plummets down to tragic end just to begin the cycle again.
I would like to have someone to love around this time, and it seems that any other month in the year I in fact do have a special someone. But once Valentine’s day creeps closer and the days on my calendar slowly diminish to the single digits, something terrible happens. This blog is going to express my rage and sorrowful emotion because I know I can’t express it any other way without ripping my hair out. I met this boy spontaneously, and instantly we became the best of friends. Of course when something like this happens it seems magical, and although I was very happy that I had met this person I was also wary and afraid of being hurt… But with the displays of his fondness, and his honesty; my wariness began to fade and I didn’t have the slightest worry or anxiety about our situation. And , so, like an idiot I allowed myself to be overcome with emotion and my mind with an overpowering sense of affection and well being. However like every other good thing, there is a consequence or a small chance of the good thing becoming bad.
Its peculiar that every time something absolutely amazing happens to me something equally evil and horrible happens and throws the good feelings out of whack and leaves me with my chest ripped open and my heart beating within it; so fragile and vulnerable to any sort of attack that could be thrown at it and rip its soft tissue to ribbons. Of course maybe I am overreacting, and now that I’m reflecting on what I’ve just typed it does seem a little odd that I’m reacting this way. Because usually relationships happen with me, and if they end I am slightly sorrowful but I maintain a dignified composer. I poured my heart and soul into this little kid, and my expectations for him were high. But now I doubt I can ever see him again (even as a friend) without bursting into humiliating tears; And its like a cycle, once my story reaches its climax it plummets down to tragic end just to begin the cycle again.
--Cloud Envy.
8:04 AM
1 commented
8:04 AM
1 commented
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Scene Kid
With a quirked brow and a gaped jaw you watch as I make my way down the hall. A tight lipped smile and a great air of self satisfaction adorning my facial features; all the while my bleached blonde hair not moving an inch because of the liquid cement I use to style it. Of course I’d give you a brief insignificant glance as I walk by, and from that moment you’ll be stricken with the conclusion: we’re from two different worlds. Teenagers are constantly worrying about how other people see them, and what they think of them. They mold themselves to be what society wants them to be, or how they want others to see them, and of course this is also true of me-- to an extent. Appearance, toys, and the invisible link that connects us is going to be the theme of this thrashing.
My eyes consist of a green and yellow substance; by matter of personal opinion they are absolutely gorgeous, but of course it’s a personal opinion. I shroud the lids of these jade observers with a very thick coat of black eyeliner. The Egyptians used coal as eyeliner way back when to protect their eyes from the sun; it was used as a natural sunglass, however, I think the thickness and darkness of the eyeliner makes my eyes stand out because the enveloped brighter hue of my eye and my tufts of ‘big’ hair that surround it creates a beautiful focal point. I bleach my hair to such an extent that I make albinos shamed that they can’t rock white hair as well as I do. Besides the extreme tone of my hair I also fashion it to (what some would call) an excessive extent. Every morning I straighten it twice, tease it upright, and apply lethal clouds of hairspray; by the time I am finished it looks like the crown of a giant willow tree. Some people would feel like a clown looking like this, so how do I do it? The answer is simple: I feel handsome striding beside people, with loud obnoxious hair and makeup with pretty music playing in my ear.
Pretty music as defined by me is: anything and everything that flows down my ear hole that can capture (and hold) my attention all the while nourishing my imagination and creativity. Genre’s (or in some cases things) that do this are: techno, rock, classical, screamo, folk, metal, alternative, trance, reggae, audio books, my phones vibration, Sulvestor Stalone, and heart beats. I have in my possession an Ipod Classic, 120 Gb. It holds 30,000 songs or 150 hours of video, of course I have half of that memory already used up. I have my Ipod on me or by my side every second of every day, and so do most teenagers however I don’t listen to my Ipod to block out the sound around me or to give me something to do; but instead I listen to it so it’ll give a beat and kind of “soundtrack” to my life. Besides my Ipod I usually have my cellular device in hand. This keeps me constantly in touch with my friends and family, and although it’s on my person at all times it doesn’t get as much attention as the Ipod does, it isn’t used so much for texting but rather it is an LG Shine, and I use its shiny surface as a mirror to fix my big hair and smudged raccoon makeup. Hair, Makeup, Phone, Ipod, the most basic qualities of your average teenager, right? Wrong.
Although my ego is as colossal as my hair I am not rude. I am very kind to everyone about me until they do something wrong, and then I secretly condemn them to the deepest pits of hell ( of course within my psyche). Since I am a teenager I have experienced almost every emotion, scenario, and thought a teenager can think about: Relationships, appearance, academic success, future, car, maturity… Blahh, however, I’ve been through and felt these things starting from a very young age (as mentioned before in previous blogs) and so I find what most teenagers would be catastrophic events to be daily and natural occurrences. I am more adult than I should be, but inside more silly and childlike than I should be, and on the outside more rebellious and tacky than I should be. But who sets the bar for these “should bes?” Society, the general public, and your peers based on the majority and prime stereotype in an area.
Why should everyone be the same? Why should we have to live up to an idea of future that was thought up for us, and pressed upon us as we grow up? I think that we should not and I deliberately refuse to. My personality, and appearance publicly display my rejection of the common belief that we should all be unoriginal in order to be ‘normal’. Why talk the talk when you can swim against the tide and fly the walk? To all of those boys and girls that are afraid to be made fun of, or singled out because their different and themselves: I’m a billboard, advertising your aging confidence, self-destruction and sagging self-esteem.
My eyes consist of a green and yellow substance; by matter of personal opinion they are absolutely gorgeous, but of course it’s a personal opinion. I shroud the lids of these jade observers with a very thick coat of black eyeliner. The Egyptians used coal as eyeliner way back when to protect their eyes from the sun; it was used as a natural sunglass, however, I think the thickness and darkness of the eyeliner makes my eyes stand out because the enveloped brighter hue of my eye and my tufts of ‘big’ hair that surround it creates a beautiful focal point. I bleach my hair to such an extent that I make albinos shamed that they can’t rock white hair as well as I do. Besides the extreme tone of my hair I also fashion it to (what some would call) an excessive extent. Every morning I straighten it twice, tease it upright, and apply lethal clouds of hairspray; by the time I am finished it looks like the crown of a giant willow tree. Some people would feel like a clown looking like this, so how do I do it? The answer is simple: I feel handsome striding beside people, with loud obnoxious hair and makeup with pretty music playing in my ear.
Pretty music as defined by me is: anything and everything that flows down my ear hole that can capture (and hold) my attention all the while nourishing my imagination and creativity. Genre’s (or in some cases things) that do this are: techno, rock, classical, screamo, folk, metal, alternative, trance, reggae, audio books, my phones vibration, Sulvestor Stalone, and heart beats. I have in my possession an Ipod Classic, 120 Gb. It holds 30,000 songs or 150 hours of video, of course I have half of that memory already used up. I have my Ipod on me or by my side every second of every day, and so do most teenagers however I don’t listen to my Ipod to block out the sound around me or to give me something to do; but instead I listen to it so it’ll give a beat and kind of “soundtrack” to my life. Besides my Ipod I usually have my cellular device in hand. This keeps me constantly in touch with my friends and family, and although it’s on my person at all times it doesn’t get as much attention as the Ipod does, it isn’t used so much for texting but rather it is an LG Shine, and I use its shiny surface as a mirror to fix my big hair and smudged raccoon makeup. Hair, Makeup, Phone, Ipod, the most basic qualities of your average teenager, right? Wrong.
Although my ego is as colossal as my hair I am not rude. I am very kind to everyone about me until they do something wrong, and then I secretly condemn them to the deepest pits of hell ( of course within my psyche). Since I am a teenager I have experienced almost every emotion, scenario, and thought a teenager can think about: Relationships, appearance, academic success, future, car, maturity… Blahh, however, I’ve been through and felt these things starting from a very young age (as mentioned before in previous blogs) and so I find what most teenagers would be catastrophic events to be daily and natural occurrences. I am more adult than I should be, but inside more silly and childlike than I should be, and on the outside more rebellious and tacky than I should be. But who sets the bar for these “should bes?” Society, the general public, and your peers based on the majority and prime stereotype in an area.
Why should everyone be the same? Why should we have to live up to an idea of future that was thought up for us, and pressed upon us as we grow up? I think that we should not and I deliberately refuse to. My personality, and appearance publicly display my rejection of the common belief that we should all be unoriginal in order to be ‘normal’. Why talk the talk when you can swim against the tide and fly the walk? To all of those boys and girls that are afraid to be made fun of, or singled out because their different and themselves: I’m a billboard, advertising your aging confidence, self-destruction and sagging self-esteem.
--Cloud Envy.
9:44 AM
0 commented
9:44 AM
0 commented
Friday, January 23, 2009
January Twenty Third, Two Thousand Nine.
The new semester has arrived and I am quite content with the classes I am now in. Only two classes have been changed however the two that have replaced them are just as fun (if not better) than the ones I took previously. One of those new classes is Teen Living. Teen Living is basically a class where the teacher informs us of all the different experiences and emotions we might encounter while in our teen years. Since the beginning of the new term was on Wednesday, the disclosure was passed out and explained yesterday, today we actually began our first lesson. It went something like this:
I scuffled into the classroom. Of course I was almost late, however, I figured that If I was asked for an excuse as to why I was late I would simply reply “Well, I had to walk all the way here from the other side of the school.” Whether she would excuse my absence or not was unknown to me, but I really didn’t care. I found my seat and placed my binder and copy of Great Expectations (by Charles Dickens) on the desk and sat down. My gaze wandered across the classroom and I found some of the smiling faces of my friends that I shared the class with. Our teacher cleared her throat and took role. After doing so she walked to one of her mysterious cupboards and pulled out two tins of Chips Ahoy cookies. I could feel the ecstatic vibes that seemed to flow off from my classmates around me.
“Well class,” She said while handing out cookies (two to a person) and a sheet of paper, “I would like you to compare yourself to these cookies.” Of course the class gave her very questionable looks. When she was done passing out the treats she again cleared her throat and explained in detail. “Upon this paper I have handed out to you I want you to think of eight ways that teenagers are like cookies.” Of course this statement got about as much of a reaction as the first. Again I glanced around at my peers and saw confusion and frustration on many of their faces. I grabbed a pencil from the pouch within my binder and began to scribble down my answers.
The time came when she called for attention and asked us all to give her a few answers as to why we think teenagers are like cookies. She called upon this especially annoying boy and he replied, “How can teenagers be like cookies? Cookies don’t have legs!” Of course this response got a few chuckles but for the most part it was a pretty lame statement. With a sigh I rose my hand and the teacher glanced at me; she looked as if she was surprised to see me participate. After a moment she called on me to give her an answer. With a confident voice I looked at the cookies that were laid upon a napkin before me, and then looked proudly at the teacher, “Different sorts of ingredients create different kinds of cookies, this can be compared to the scenarios that teenagers experience in their life. It also creates a different teenager.” In awe the teacher congratulated me because of my deep answer, and you could clearly see my classmates turn purple with jealousy.
Now I am reflecting upon my answer again and I am actually praising myself for such a good answer, because it is such a good one. Some kids are born in different environments, with different opportunities, with both parents, one parent, or even sometimes with no parents. The things that occurred in our early lives created the present product: who we are. No two of us teenagers are the same, and no two cookies are the same. You can go buy a package of cookies at the store and they won’t be perfect; they could be overcooked, broken, ingredients left out, or many other uncountable mishaps could occur. My ingredients weren’t especially chosen, and the conditions of which I were “baked” were not superior compared to any of my peers, however, I did turn out to be a splendid cookie. Even though I’m not perfect.
I scuffled into the classroom. Of course I was almost late, however, I figured that If I was asked for an excuse as to why I was late I would simply reply “Well, I had to walk all the way here from the other side of the school.” Whether she would excuse my absence or not was unknown to me, but I really didn’t care. I found my seat and placed my binder and copy of Great Expectations (by Charles Dickens) on the desk and sat down. My gaze wandered across the classroom and I found some of the smiling faces of my friends that I shared the class with. Our teacher cleared her throat and took role. After doing so she walked to one of her mysterious cupboards and pulled out two tins of Chips Ahoy cookies. I could feel the ecstatic vibes that seemed to flow off from my classmates around me.
“Well class,” She said while handing out cookies (two to a person) and a sheet of paper, “I would like you to compare yourself to these cookies.” Of course the class gave her very questionable looks. When she was done passing out the treats she again cleared her throat and explained in detail. “Upon this paper I have handed out to you I want you to think of eight ways that teenagers are like cookies.” Of course this statement got about as much of a reaction as the first. Again I glanced around at my peers and saw confusion and frustration on many of their faces. I grabbed a pencil from the pouch within my binder and began to scribble down my answers.
The time came when she called for attention and asked us all to give her a few answers as to why we think teenagers are like cookies. She called upon this especially annoying boy and he replied, “How can teenagers be like cookies? Cookies don’t have legs!” Of course this response got a few chuckles but for the most part it was a pretty lame statement. With a sigh I rose my hand and the teacher glanced at me; she looked as if she was surprised to see me participate. After a moment she called on me to give her an answer. With a confident voice I looked at the cookies that were laid upon a napkin before me, and then looked proudly at the teacher, “Different sorts of ingredients create different kinds of cookies, this can be compared to the scenarios that teenagers experience in their life. It also creates a different teenager.” In awe the teacher congratulated me because of my deep answer, and you could clearly see my classmates turn purple with jealousy.
Now I am reflecting upon my answer again and I am actually praising myself for such a good answer, because it is such a good one. Some kids are born in different environments, with different opportunities, with both parents, one parent, or even sometimes with no parents. The things that occurred in our early lives created the present product: who we are. No two of us teenagers are the same, and no two cookies are the same. You can go buy a package of cookies at the store and they won’t be perfect; they could be overcooked, broken, ingredients left out, or many other uncountable mishaps could occur. My ingredients weren’t especially chosen, and the conditions of which I were “baked” were not superior compared to any of my peers, however, I did turn out to be a splendid cookie. Even though I’m not perfect.
Labels: Cookies, friendship, january 23 2009, teen living, teenagers, trials
--Cloud Envy.
2:25 PM
1 commented
2:25 PM
1 commented
Friday, January 16, 2009
January Sixteenth, Two Thousand and Nine.
From a young age I’ve always thought of myself as different. I’ve considered myself to have an advantage over people; without ever knowing what the advantage is exactly. Maybe it is just a form of arrogance, and I’m subconsciously deeming myself superior compared to my peers. I have high expectations of my future when it comes to school, work, and the relationships I share with people; however, I have always had these expectations. Though at times I have strayed from the path, the goals were always in mind.
In elementary I strived to have good grades mostly because my dad and grandfather would pay me, however when asked what I was going to have as a career I would reply “Anything that makes a lot of money!” When my grades began to fall my reply would be the same. No matter what the person thought, or what their comments tried to enrage within me I would keep a level headed calmness, and confidence. Seventh and Eighth grade did not go so well. Since arriving in Seventh grade I had friends that were grades ahead of me; when I asked them for advice about surviving junior high they would reply “Well, nothing really counts until ninth grade.” So my grades dropped and I didn’t care much about it; I figured that it really didn’t count until ninth grade, but I was wrong. Now that I am in ninth grade it is evident that my old habits did not carry on with me into this school year, and I am extremely successful and proficient with my school work and informational intake. I only hope that I continue to do well in school so that I will have a high income job that I enjoy.
A job, well what can I say? The idea of getting (or maintaining) one scares me! Not because I think it will be hard for me to do, but because I fear that I could not be performing my best while having the job. I am a perfectionist (as I’ve explained mannyyy times before) and because of that I always evaluate the things I do and what others do, so that my comparison is accurate that I can be better than them. Early in my life I realized that life is based on competition between schools, companies, governments and etc. As humans we are constantly trying to outdo each other, so in order to do well in life you must be able to adapt quickly and in an orderly fashion. I am interested in Technology and Artistic subjects. I have not definitely decided what sort of job I want to have but what I know is this: 1) It must involved Technology and Art. 2) I want to enjoy it. 3) I want to get paid a lot to do it. You might be thinking, “Well, that’s all fine and dandy but your expectations are too high.” And they might be, however I am sure that there is a perfect job out there for me and I will not settle for anything less than that perfect job. Now, my education and future career are constantly nagging at my brain, but there is also the matter of my social well being.
I have never been very choosy about the friends I have, they must simply pass of the criteria of: being trustworthy, kind, and vibrant; lately however there has been an addition to the criteria and that is they must be positive. I am easily affected by the people’s moods around me and because of this I experience constant mood swings. I have been unable to change that quality in myself and so I took advantage of my life and decided to apply it to others. Although the basic criteria seems simple, the four subjects that are enlisted fall into different categories when applied to different scenarios and my ruling does not change (no matter the situation); I am firm and set with the expectations I have of those I choose to call my friends. I’ve decided that no matter who I choose to be my friends I mustn’t let them keep me down, because although I’d like to drag them with me their values are probably different and chances are we’re heading in two different directions.
It can be said that I have a head on my shoulders and I know just what I’m going to do with my life, this is partially true. All I can say is my future is undetermined, but completely decided.
In elementary I strived to have good grades mostly because my dad and grandfather would pay me, however when asked what I was going to have as a career I would reply “Anything that makes a lot of money!” When my grades began to fall my reply would be the same. No matter what the person thought, or what their comments tried to enrage within me I would keep a level headed calmness, and confidence. Seventh and Eighth grade did not go so well. Since arriving in Seventh grade I had friends that were grades ahead of me; when I asked them for advice about surviving junior high they would reply “Well, nothing really counts until ninth grade.” So my grades dropped and I didn’t care much about it; I figured that it really didn’t count until ninth grade, but I was wrong. Now that I am in ninth grade it is evident that my old habits did not carry on with me into this school year, and I am extremely successful and proficient with my school work and informational intake. I only hope that I continue to do well in school so that I will have a high income job that I enjoy.
A job, well what can I say? The idea of getting (or maintaining) one scares me! Not because I think it will be hard for me to do, but because I fear that I could not be performing my best while having the job. I am a perfectionist (as I’ve explained mannyyy times before) and because of that I always evaluate the things I do and what others do, so that my comparison is accurate that I can be better than them. Early in my life I realized that life is based on competition between schools, companies, governments and etc. As humans we are constantly trying to outdo each other, so in order to do well in life you must be able to adapt quickly and in an orderly fashion. I am interested in Technology and Artistic subjects. I have not definitely decided what sort of job I want to have but what I know is this: 1) It must involved Technology and Art. 2) I want to enjoy it. 3) I want to get paid a lot to do it. You might be thinking, “Well, that’s all fine and dandy but your expectations are too high.” And they might be, however I am sure that there is a perfect job out there for me and I will not settle for anything less than that perfect job. Now, my education and future career are constantly nagging at my brain, but there is also the matter of my social well being.
I have never been very choosy about the friends I have, they must simply pass of the criteria of: being trustworthy, kind, and vibrant; lately however there has been an addition to the criteria and that is they must be positive. I am easily affected by the people’s moods around me and because of this I experience constant mood swings. I have been unable to change that quality in myself and so I took advantage of my life and decided to apply it to others. Although the basic criteria seems simple, the four subjects that are enlisted fall into different categories when applied to different scenarios and my ruling does not change (no matter the situation); I am firm and set with the expectations I have of those I choose to call my friends. I’ve decided that no matter who I choose to be my friends I mustn’t let them keep me down, because although I’d like to drag them with me their values are probably different and chances are we’re heading in two different directions.
It can be said that I have a head on my shoulders and I know just what I’m going to do with my life, this is partially true. All I can say is my future is undetermined, but completely decided.
--Cloud Envy.
3:24 PM
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3:24 PM
0 commented
Monday, January 5, 2009
Untitled.
I sluggishly had crawled to the computer chair, before heaving a deep sigh and plopping down upon it. The fabric squelched and plastic of which it was built sounded like it had groaned because of the sudden weight dispensed upon it; subconsciously the weight I had gained over break came to mind. My hand brushed my nose and I sniffled, chills racking my bones from head to toe. “First day back,” I said to myself while pushing the CPU’s on switch. I impatiently waited for the computer to come alive while sipping hot cocoa; it seemed just as reluctant as I to begin homework.
The screen blinked on, and robotically I typed in the security password. Again I waited for the boot process to continue so I could open my trusted document processer: Microsoft Word. Within moments I had a blank document opened before me. While the computer was “warming up”, I had evaluated all the homework I had and decided to do my weekly blog first, the blog that you are reading.
“What a silly thing to type about!” You might be thinking, However, I disagree. After getting back from a sixteen day break my brain is mush; I couldn’t possibly think of a better way to start a blog than describing the process of writing the blog, Haha. But now that I reflect upon the idea, it doesn’t sound very interesting. While I am typing this up the peculiarness of this whole thing is actually sinking in, and quite frankly its confusing me on how I am supposed to be typing up a blog about typing it up. I suppose the process is seemingly easy and shouldn’t be hard to do, but while the tips of my fingers are stroking the keys of my Acer keyboard I find myself puzzled about what I am to say next…
So I will describe my present mood; It is very hard to explain. Right now there are very many emotions surging through me and quite a lot of things floating about in my cranium. Today, was wonderful. It was a normal day of course. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, However today my mindset was different opposed to any other day that has occurred. Maybe it is because it is the first school day of 2009? I do not know. What I do know is that all of the average annoyances took place today, but none of them displaced my good mood. Why such a good mood? What took place over break that has caused such a change?
The answer is simple, the Friday that school got out for Christmas break I met someone. A boy, and you might be thinking “Oh dear, another one lost to love.” And it is partially true, ahaha. But this kid isn’t like anyone I have ever known, he could sincerely be considered my other half… I think the matter is partially too personal to actually be describing in a blog, but if this ‘love’ does not last long it most definitely will be a lifelong friendship. He makes me happy, and brings sun on the once gloomy landscaped life I live.
The screen blinked on, and robotically I typed in the security password. Again I waited for the boot process to continue so I could open my trusted document processer: Microsoft Word. Within moments I had a blank document opened before me. While the computer was “warming up”, I had evaluated all the homework I had and decided to do my weekly blog first, the blog that you are reading.
“What a silly thing to type about!” You might be thinking, However, I disagree. After getting back from a sixteen day break my brain is mush; I couldn’t possibly think of a better way to start a blog than describing the process of writing the blog, Haha. But now that I reflect upon the idea, it doesn’t sound very interesting. While I am typing this up the peculiarness of this whole thing is actually sinking in, and quite frankly its confusing me on how I am supposed to be typing up a blog about typing it up. I suppose the process is seemingly easy and shouldn’t be hard to do, but while the tips of my fingers are stroking the keys of my Acer keyboard I find myself puzzled about what I am to say next…
So I will describe my present mood; It is very hard to explain. Right now there are very many emotions surging through me and quite a lot of things floating about in my cranium. Today, was wonderful. It was a normal day of course. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, However today my mindset was different opposed to any other day that has occurred. Maybe it is because it is the first school day of 2009? I do not know. What I do know is that all of the average annoyances took place today, but none of them displaced my good mood. Why such a good mood? What took place over break that has caused such a change?
The answer is simple, the Friday that school got out for Christmas break I met someone. A boy, and you might be thinking “Oh dear, another one lost to love.” And it is partially true, ahaha. But this kid isn’t like anyone I have ever known, he could sincerely be considered my other half… I think the matter is partially too personal to actually be describing in a blog, but if this ‘love’ does not last long it most definitely will be a lifelong friendship. He makes me happy, and brings sun on the once gloomy landscaped life I live.
--Cloud Envy.
2:57 PM
1 commented
2:57 PM
1 commented